Skip to main content

Redeeming the Time

I realized these past few days, when i hear myself speak, that I've been making up reasons to excuse my mediocrity - in school, at home, in my relationships.. As what a good friend said, 'tweak my thoughts'! >< If my old ways aren't working, then there's gotta be a change.

What brought this on was the 100th episode of oversleeping in 'Here's My Life: Snore, a case of Joanne-commonness', today. again. Ahh!

Hung out with the pooks La Jang, Leen Bean and Peannette, chatting and 'surprise!'- studying into the a.m. Lol.. I was really running on something else I can tell you, but I totally crashed when I got home at 5am... Tutorials begin at 10 - woo! 2 hours of sleep! - i thought. Then the next thing I know is waking up with my dad announcing lunch time. I glanced at the clock (if you knew my clock, you would understand my confusion. Talk about non-descript, you need a high IQ to read the time off it!) and was all: 'haha.. funny dad, it's only 9..' and then, 'IT'S TWELVE WHAT IN THE WORLD HOW COME MY ALARM DIDN'T RING???'

The gravity of the situation is due to my PAST oversleeping episodes, which brings my total number of missed tutorials to about 5...!!! I know! Gripping-my-cheeks-and-blanking-out-horror! >< And the worst thing is I DID do my tutorial this week. Haha.


But really, I remember how I was thinking just a few weeks back during my midterm papers. In an attempt to console myself over my pitiful attempts at filling up the answer sheet with some legible Joanne-theory, I told myself and accepted it as logic that I shouldn't judge myself on grades. Given enough time, I know I can get A. So there.

BUT... reading the Bible (trying to catch up with my reading more like), caught that phrase 'redeeming the time' from Paul to the Colossians in Colossians 3, and I was brought back to the message that Pst preached concerning that. Though I forget the details, I do remember key messages that meant something to me, convicted me in the past. And here it was again: Redeeming the time.

Everyone can excel GIVEN TIME. If there were no more of that ultimate limitation, how much more could we accomplish in our lifetime! But therein lies the reality that I try to escape - the challenge of life is to do the best you can, the best you know how, with the time that is alloted to you. At the end of the day, there is no 'I could have done that...' or 'That was a good idea that I had back then...' because empty talk (which I am wont to do) doesn't have anything to back it up. As I would have said in primary school, 'NOT COUNTED'!

So there, I'll receive that challenge, and make the most of it.

One thing that Natalie Portman said when a reporter asked her how she managed filming 2 movies while pursuing her degree in college : that having more things on her plate made her spend her time more wisely.

Yup. I gotta learn that.


Popular posts from this blog

There must be more than this
Oh breath of God come breathe within
There must be more than this
Spirit of God we wait on You

Fill us anew we pray
Fill us anew we pray

Consuming fire fan into flame
A passion for Your name
Spirit of God won't You fall in this place
Lord have your way Lord have your way in us

Stir it up in our hearts Lord
Stir it up in our hearts Lord
Stir it up in our hearts Lord a passion for your name

As Sy Rogers said today, there are things we can look back on, our memorial stones, that encourage us and give us strength to move forward. I rmb a time I was so far away and so tired of people in general, cos really it's relationships that really get me down - n when Jean would walk in on me crying or just sitting and not even having the energy to do stuff, she would listen n say 'just cry out to God alright?' and that would be the last thing i wanted to hear. sometimes you know what to do, and you know what the advice will be, but when the emotions are not there, an…

on mountains and perspective

Kept awake by a bout of traveler's diarrhea and the ensuing abdominal colic. Just been back from an attempt at Mount Kinabalu, 'highest mountain in Southeast Asia'. Okay, those apostrophes are there out of bitterness... it really is the highest mountain in Southeast Asia. And I couldn't even attempt the summit. Made it to the base camp at 3067 m though... that's what it says on my black-and-white certificate - colored ones are only for successful summit-ers.  Crrr!

But I made it back with my life. And I'm humbler for the attempt, though how could I resist the parting shot: "I'll be back!"?

But on a more serious note, it's an awesome thing, a beautiful gift to be able to get out there into as natural a surrounding you can get (without dying a slow tv-less death from cold, altitude sickness, projectile vomit and did I mention cold?). It truly seems like one never can be happy - despite all my first-world comforts, I'd gladly pay to painfully…

hello from the other side

hello to the old me (6 years, yikes!)

hello from someone who's discovered that old is just another word for diminishing physical capacity, but increasing everything-else capacity!

The old me would have said, I should have posted more regularly and I shall post more often now... but I'm glad in hindsight that I held to my belief that I should only post when I've something positive to contribute. Not just words, but how they are birthed. Words written without vanity. And words written not to solicit approval in replacement of the lack of it elsewhere. Words that aren't hurried through the time needed to process and ruminate over the experiences of the past few years (dramatic in some aspects, mundane in most so all in all pretty much as per everyone else's I would expect!).

Still, a little mortifying to realise that I don't know how to work the buttons (!) and to realise I'd forgotten so many things, and yet in some respects, am still entirely the same.

And O…