No Reserves, No Retreats, No Regrets

this week was really maddeningly challenging.(!!!) i think everything just piled up so that my face was super long like papaya. HAHA... not so much the things that i've to do, but the stress that i associated with them. anyway, this wk's sermons were v gd. during cg, jingxuan preached about going through trials and i feel, no matter how much we know, it always feels good to hear someone else talk about it and help put into words what we all feel. same with Pst Tan's message on ambivalence and procrastination - it's really when we see the link between these issues and how they affect our spiritual walk, our family life etc., that it becomes more than some self-help conference. it's the truth - and i really felt v convicted about what he said, abt - decisiveness being the quality to bring about change. - how the double-minded man is unstable in all his ways. - how we shouldn't keep waiting for perfect conditions - God still uses us, or more accurately, He uses us ...

i like this yr's Easter drama! heh.. for one, cos Sheila's acting! haha.. it was a lot of fun watching cg member's faces when Sheila started speaking.. =) felt that they really did a great job! can see how much effort everyone had to put in for just one play, much less 3-4! props, lightings, subtitles, having part of the script in Chinese!, improvising when things go wrong.. wow! drama quite exciting eh.. haha.. but like what Ai said, think the only roles that we can do without laughing are those of the roman soldiers! - cos they're alr laughing.. watched Passion of the Christ when we came home after Fri services. I think that was what really enhanced that whole Easter experience. really seeing how Jesus was really God and 'one of us' at the same time. i'm glad Pst prayed for the Christians today too. we can all do with regular spiritual remembrances like Easter and Christmas - i realize that we tend to forget things v easily. sometimes it has to take the mo...

In line with my post title, all future 'W's' (there u go) will be capitalized. I've just realized that my posts are so random. I get on about something, then end With another point. HaWhaW. Any of u can find an un-capitalized W.... feel free to treat me to something! ;D hoho That's the story of my academic life noW actually. I'm so physically spent that all the momentum I've gotten from getting such ::*beautiful*:: grades (meaning that they're so bad that they need manual decoration), is spent on sitting in front of the comp W all my digital notepads packed, and my mind going 'DUHHHHHHH'. Haha.. apologies to my project mates and colleagues at Work Who are never gonna read this post (but at least i feel better for saying it) for the virus called sleep_deprivation that has Wiped out Joanne's mental files. Emotional too. more and more though, I'm Wondering (yes, With a capital W), if this is cos I might do better studying something else. som...

it's quite amazing what you do when you lose control over yourself because you haven't bonded adequately with your bed. For example, i can't even read what i took down for service. And you can seriously be so tired you start crying because you are tired. Not because of emotional tiredness, or signs of nervous breakdown, or stress. Just a way for the body to unwind. Definitely need a break. But it's only going to get more intense these few weeks. Took me a while to realize that my waiting for the day when I'm ready to take all this, will never come, till i face up to today's stuff. Like yay, 3 months holiday, but I know i gotta earn the peace of mind by working my butt off this sem. Dunno when I started getting stressed up. Midterms maybe. But definitely it's affecting my joy. And no joy, no strength to do work, to handle people's crap, to handle people period. There's just a desire when you wake up after 10 hrs of sleep, to sleep for another day. How...