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=) This week's service was GREAT! Lol... I was so tired from - ironically enough - SLEEPover, & waking up early (early is an understatement; we have to create a word to describe 'obscenely early') to accompany Aileen for her hospi-ministry! When Pastor started his introduction, knowing it was one of the 4 F's to start the year, I was so prepared to write down 'fortitude' - you know, wow, something new! When Pastor said, 'Faith', I was like, 'oh oh,' cos I knew I might fall asleep! X''@

BUT really.. timely Word! ;) Especially when school is starting out, work is getting into motion, projects, assignments, looming (already!) mid-terms... I really need faith = CONFIDENCE, an assurance in God that He'll be with me, NOW! ;D

It was really a revelation to me that God wants us to be confident IN Him, and that this confidence is what can help us succeed our there in the marketplace! When I was struggling with my insecurities just last year, the idea was unpalatable to me! Somehow, even while knowing the truth, it's so easy to think humility equates to thinking lowly of oneself, being self-deprecating & others-centred. I used to view young people rising up in church with some envy, & with a little cyncism. In my heart, I would wonder if all that hype & popularity & glowing reports would blow them up; if that confidence I saw was due to SELF-confidence. Even now, I would think it a bit hard to differentiate. Though of course, it doesn't really matter. Everyone's in a process of growing. ;D

Yea, that's what i wanna say lor - stepping out isn't just psyching yourself to believing that God will, MUST show up if you sacrifice etc. - it's putting confidence in God FIRST even without proof of His taking any action, ESPECIALLY when it's hard to place confidence in YOURSELF, so that your actions will be out of conviction & purposeful, with no sign of giving into your fears. That's when you start changing the environment around you. It's not just X-factor, or charisma, or great leadership potential - it's choosing to just let God use u!

But yea~ I'm so glad for the Word! During ministry, it was just so awesome to see Pastor laying hands on the CG leaders cos I know that the anointing will flow down to us! XD Yay... thank God for breakthrough!


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